Let’s talk about something that gets left out of the puberty talk way too often: mental health.
We prep kids for periods, body hair, and the awkward deodorant phase - but what about the emotional storm that rolls in alongside all of that? The stuff no one posts about? The sudden sadness, the spirals, the shutting down?
Puberty doesn’t just change bodies. It flips brains and feelings inside out - especially for girls and young people with periods. So if you're a parent wondering, “Is this normal or something deeper?”, you’re not alone - and you’re not wrong to ask.
To help navigate this stage with more clarity and less silence, we turned to Riky Hanaumi, LCSW, a licensed therapist and Clinical Director at Laguna View Detox. She’s worked closely with teens, parents, and families for over a decade, and she gets it. Below, she shares what parents really need to know about puberty and mental health - no fluff, no judgment, just the truth.
How can you tell the difference between normal mood swings and something more serious?
Teenagers are moody - sure. But not all mood changes are “just hormones.” Some could be signs of deeper struggles that need support, not dismissal.
Riky Hanaumi shares a simple but powerful way to tell the difference:
“Mood swings are normal, but some things aren't: Constant isolation, irritability and loss of interest, for example. If there is change in sleep, appetite, or even school performance you need to be alert.
Here’s a simple way to determine this: the once ‘normal’ tends to fade away, whereas the complicated remains and becomes more prevalent.”
If your once-chatty kid has gone completely quiet, or if they’re losing interest in everything that used to bring joy - don’t brush it off. Trust your gut and check in.
Why is puberty such a vulnerable time for mental wellbeing - especially for girls?
Between body image pressures, period stigma, and a culture that’s way too quiet about how it all actually feels, puberty can be an emotionally loaded time - especially for girls and anyone with a uterus.
Here’s how Riky breaks it down:
“The body changes rapidly and sometimes the mind cannot keep up. Hormones don't create new emotions; they just intensify what is already there: anxiety, insecurity, anger - everything.
Girls already have enough issues to worry about like the body image/pressure, constant comparisons, or even their menstrual cycles.”
So no - it’s not “just drama” or “just teenage hormones.” It’s real, it’s valid, and it’s hard. Especially when no one’s talking about it.
How do you create a home where teens actually want to talk?
You don’t need a psychology degree or a parenting book to create emotional safety. What teens really want? Space to feel what they feel - without judgment or awkwardness.
According to Riky, the vibe starts with you:
“Parents should create an atmosphere to prevent awkward inquiries and establish an empathetic channel, which is very important. Discuss the body, menstruation and feelings without shame.”
You don’t have to have all the answers. You just have to be open. Talk about your own body experiences. Normalise period products. Make space for “weird” feelings.
And most of all supporting someone is not about trying to control them or solve their problems. It’s simply about being there for them without judgment.”
Yes, even when they roll their eyes at you. Yes, even when they say nothing’s wrong. Keep the door open anyway.
What do hormones actually do to emotions?
We’ve all heard it: “It’s just hormones.” But that doesn’t mean feelings aren’t real - or overwhelming.
Riky explains that hormones don’t invent new emotions - they turn the volume up on what’s already there.
“Hormones don't create new emotions; they just intensify what is already there: anxiety, insecurity, anger - everything.”
So that moment of panic in the changing room? That burst of tears over nothing? That flood of self-doubt? It’s not “too much.” It’s biology dialled to 100. And that’s why emotional support during puberty matters just as much as pads, tampons, and period pants.
What’s the one thing every parent needs to hear?
If there’s one takeaway, one truth every parent needs stitched onto a pillow, it’s this:
“Supporting someone is not about trying to control them or solve their problems. It’s simply about being there for them without judgment.”
You don’t have to fix it. You just have to show up. With your ears open. With compassion. Without shame.
Final thoughts
Puberty is messy. It’s intense. And it doesn’t come with a neat timeline or a clear rulebook.
But what young people need - more than perfect advice or Pinterest-worthy period kits - is a safe place to feel whatever they’re feeling. They need someone who doesn’t flinch when things get uncomfortable. Someone who doesn’t rush to fix it. Someone who says, “You’re not too much - I’m here.”
Be that person. Not just for their body, but for their mind too.